post count.

wow.
i blogged waaaay more last year.
=/

trixie,

dilemma, dilemma.

the BIG QUESTION;

long?








or short?

hmmm.
dilemma. dilemma.

trixie,

honestly.

i swear to god. the standard of english in malaysia is severely deteriorating.

was doing this addmath paper, and the english is positively atrocious.
so bad, like i wanted to DIE.

23.Ahmad have 7 tins of various coloured paint to be put paint on his house.
(a) find how many ways of arranging 4 colour,
(b) He has made a mixture of 4 colour or more of paint, find the numbers of mixing the colour he has probably made.

24. Table 1 shows the probability of Karim and Jamal pass for subject Physics and Mathematics in a test. If they are taken both subject, find the probability that
(a) Karim pass both subjects.
(b) Jamal have pass only one subject.

HONESTLY??

like what the hell right?
i couldn't even understand what it meant, let alone answer the damn question.
well, i know if spm was like that, i would fail. hands down.

trixie,

ennui.

a glimpse into my everyday joblessness boredom.





trixie,

i like this new (well not really) layout solely because i have the utmost freedom to have extremely long titles such as this. *grin*

WELL.
so much for that hiatus hmm?
*gasp* i said the 'h-word'. =/

studying has been slow. like reeeally slow.
but it's moving along.
i do enough not to feel like a complete bum everyday.
that's good... right??

seriously;
internet is a bloody drug.
rp is my heroin.
my series are my morphine.

and spm is the damned cancer.

ohmygod! HR is on maintenance mode! argh!

trixie,

sniff.

holy shit, i think i'm coming down with the flu.

trixie,

meh.

ugh;
history is devastatingly dull.

trixie,

'tis the season.

i think...

it's injure trixie season yet again.

sighhhh.

passing basketballs during physio yesterday, like this huge portion of skin on my right fourth finger came off. i feel like an impaired soul. =/ i can't write properly. grr.

coupled with my swollen left forefinger, this has not been a good week. ughhh.

trixie,

owwwwwwwwww.

i slammed a door on my finger.
bloody hell.
it's all swollen now.

trixie,

creeping up on to me.

spm is coming. like seriously.
but before that, it's our spm second trials!

eck.

ohmygod. it's like nothing more interesting is happening to me that i have to blog about my upcoming examinations. how sad is that??

i swear i am going on a hiatus. but you know, i know i can't do it can i?

trixie,

holy hell in a cup.

grey's anatomy.
25th september 2008.

how am i supposed to study for exams with that *points upwards* hanging over me??
seriously!

trixie,

elevator.

I could feel a hot one taking me down
For a moment, I could feel the force
Fainted to the point of tears
And you were holding on to make a point
What's the point?

I'm but a clean man, stable and alone man
Make it so I won't have to try
The faces always stay the same
So I face the fact that I'm just fine
I said that I'm just fine.

I remember, head down,
After you had found out
Manna is a hell of a drug
And I need a little more, I think
Because enough is never quite enough
What's enough?

I took it like a grown man crying on the pavement
Hoping you would show your face
But I haven't heard a thing you've said
In at least a couple hundred days
What'd you say?

I was in the front seat, shaking it out
And I was asking if you felt alright
I never want to hear the truth
I want to hear your voice, it sounded fine
My voice, it sounded fine.

I could feel my heartbeat taking me down
And for the moment, I would sleep alright
I'm ? with a selfish fear
To keep me up another restless night
Another restless night.

The blood was dry, it was sober
The feeling of audible cracks
And I could tell it was over
From the curtains that hung from your neck.

And I realized that then you were perfect
And my teeth ripping out of my head
And it looked like a painting I once knew
Back when my thoughts weren't entirely intact.

To pray for what I thought were angels
Ended up being ambulances
And the Lord showed me dreams of my daughter
She was crying inside your stomach.

And I felt love again.

trixie,

tuesdays.

it's every tuesday that i get into screaming match with my mother.

it's every tuesday that gossip girl and one tree hill come out for downloading.

it's every bloody tuesday that makes me feel like burning all my books and failing all my exams.

it's every bloody day she pushes me that i'm closer to breaking.

i'm getting sick of all this pressure.

i'm getting sick of all this unnecessary screaming.

i'm getting sick of wasting my energy with putting up with all this shit.

i swear to god.
push me some more and i might really snap.

trixie,

so what happens next?

school is grossly uneventful. so much so that all us form5 kids just traipse in and out of it as we wish. coming extremely late, going home early, missing school entirely... yeah yeah yeah. yes i know, we are a major exam year. but heck, studying at home is way more productive than going to school at this rate.

so, stayed home from school today. on an intent to study cause seriously, friday's are useless. weeell, i can't say i studied much, but i did more than what i usually do in school. honest!

on a separate topic, i know i've been an absolutely terrible blogger. but basically i'm lazy as hell and yeah uploading pictures into my computer is such a hassle. these things i only ever do when i run out of space on my camera. which, well, is going to be a while. sorry jessie!

i promise i will will will will will. when i find the time. scratch that, i'm ridiculously free right now. but yeah. you know me.

till whenever;
trixie,

you bloody think i'm studying for you?? and just because i bloody slip up you jump at the opportunity to blame me for not studying hard enough. as if i haven't already beaten myself up about it. everytime you say i have to argue with you over everything when YOU bloody pick the bloody fight in the first bleeding place. as if i'm not already giving myself enough bloody grief about my bloody studies. hell, don't i LOOK stressed enough to you?

what do i have to bloody do to get some bloody peace?

and for the fucking record, i CAN fucking multitask.

trixie,

disney.

i have seriously been lacking in the watching tv department lately. like i think i've gone a month or more without actually touching the tv. =/ so the other day i had some free time to channelsurf and i so happened to flip to disney channel and caught cinderella 3. like since when was there a cinderella 3 right? i didn't even know there was a cinderella 2. honestly.

so i shamelessly watched the beginning. and like wow. disney movies have some really amazing songs. like the singing is unbelievable. then i flipped to tennis. =) us open, bitches. haha.

trixie,

growing''

i just finished reading through my old blog. not too hard it's seriously a short-lived one. and it's left me... fairly nostaligic? i suppose. i was all of fifteen then and now i'm like seventeen and oh how i've changed. i suppose my blogging style and even my language is still pretty much similiar. sad to know my vocabulary didn't exceedingly improve, but i surely reckon it did. it must have.

reading through reminded me of that unnecessary rift i had with my longest living friends which left everything so completely different now. it makes me real sad to think that over something so ridiculously trivial, such a long friendship could crumble. i really wonder now what would it be like if i hadn't slipped or maybe if they'd been a bit less petty. i was really sorry. i swear to god. and it totally isn't the same anymore now. even though we've patched things up. the time apart and the distance completely dampered the friendship.

aw. trixie's reminiscent. psht.

this is totally like the first time i haven't related my posts to mundane events in my boring life. this blog post has feeling. emotion. oh gasp. what is wrong with trixie?

i need to do something with my life; i need to change.

trixie,